Becoming who you are & the October hit list

Saturday, October 19, 2013

I read a quote today that really resonated with me "if something terrifies you, yet it is also equally amazing, then it is worth pursuing". People ask "why are you doing (insert verb here)" and I want to answer "why not?" I am young, I am restless and bored, I am passionate. Why not throw myself into new hobbies and explore new areas of life? 

Fear of the unknown, fear of stares, fear of what things I do say about who I am constantly hold me back. The person I am isn't always represented in my daily life. It is easy to conform to pre-set notions of what society expects of us. For example, since I am from the South, I should be inherently feminine and gravitate towards Lily Pulitzer. I am not and have never been feminine. I don't like wearing color. I would rather wear leather than anything. I am almost always overdressed. So what do these things say about me? In truth, nothing. It doesn't mean anything. It means I like to look that way. Dressing and makeup are fun because you can become whoever you want to be. What I wear says nothing of who I am, only who I wanted to be that particular day. Challenge notions that are pushed on you and become who you are. 

I become passionate, almost obsessive, about the things I do. I cannot pick up any new hobby without devoting countless hours pouring over it, soaking in any new detail I can add to my daily life. Anything shallow is the anti-thesis of my life. I have recently started a new book series, sci-fi fantasy (what else?) and have become devoted to it. I spend time emulating the characters in real life. I wonder what the main characters would say about normal mundane situations. I learn things from them. Lessons about how to carry yourself confidently, how to be more passionate about life, about how to leave your bed unmade and like the way it looks. Cleanliness is expected, therefore my room is spotless. But it is for this exact reason that I love someone who likes their bed unmade, not as a careless fact, but as an intentional gesture. I wonder sometimes, if I could go back in time, if I would have wanted to pursue acting. And who knows? You are never too old to pick up a new art. 

Now that I am done with school and on the edge of new adventures, I vow to become the person I am. I vow to wear what moves me each day, without thought to societal conventions. I vow to post my blog on Facebook, even though it is scary. I vow to write what makes my heart beat faster. I vow to be true to myself and surround myself with people that will not limit me. I vow to do things that scare me. I vow to never be ordinary. The sky is the limit and I must live like I could touch it each and every day. 

Lastly, I saw another quote (#pinterestobsessed) this week that resonated with me. "If you are going to be weird, be confident about it". This has become my new daily mantra.

So in light of all the new things learned, I post my October Hit List. These are things that are moving my soul lately:
- designing my cross tattoo 
- The 1975 band. Like all of their music. All the time. Watch the video for the song "Chocolate". Life changing.
- everything Lily Collins wears and Jamie Campbell Bower says/does
- my clunky, dirty motorcycle boots
- researching makeup artistry and how to take classes to become a freelance artist one day
- Nashville, cities with "salt" 
- photography

I hope you are having a wonderful day! Let the world see the real you today. It's missing you.


  1. I have felt this exact same way. I have even been wanting a cross tattoo for months now, and I have been looking at apartments in Nashville! (Let's do it! Roommates?) It is scary putting yourself out there, but I have gotten to the point in my life that I don't care. I don't care if someone doesn't like what I like or my thoughts or opinions on something. It's who I am, and that's enough for me. Keep it up girl! :)

  2. thanks :) do you have a job lined up there? I need to do more research. We have so much in common! I am actually working on the tattoo now. I am not naturally artistic, so it takes some effort. Although I know what I want the end result to look like. What are your ideas for yours? We need to have a coffee date ASAP!


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